Kelly Memoriam

THE SLOW DEATH

Kelly Dyan Hendershot

by Connie Lann - Kelly's Mom

She was 7 lb. and 14 oz. when she was born Kelly Dyan Hendershot. She was always happy and smiling as a little girl. She played with her Cabbage Patch dolls, was a Brownie Girl Scout for 3 years, and loved all animals. She was born to be a "Mom" as she wanted to be a mom ever since she was a little girl. At age 18 her wish came true, and she brought into this world a little boy. He was the love of her life, except for the child's father whom she had met at age 16. They were together for 5 years off and on before her death.

At first I saw that she was very happy to find someone who cared so much for her. She was young and I had hoped she would outgrow her infatuation with the young boy she met in 1996. Then I began to see alienation from her family and friends. He did everything in his power to keep her in his world of violence and control. That was what he had known growing up in a domestic violence home, and he repeated his father's footsteps.

At my daughter's request, I tried to accept him into our family. He was invited to family gatherings, her birthday celebrations and her son's birthday parties. They had lived together for a few years after the child was born but as I started seeing bruises on her body and deterioration in her laughter. I knew something was wrong, very wrong! I started spending as much time as possible at their house, just dropping by unannounced, whenever possible at all hours of the night and day. I insisted on spending time with my daughter alone. Kelly was working full-time and supporting the family. From the age of 16, she had worked and been self-supportive as much as possible. The father stayed home to take care of the child. She continued to deny there was anything wrong as she always thought she could control the situation. She was "dead" wrong.

By the year 2000, Kelly's spirit had been beaten down so much that she started becoming depressed. She had been beaten and dragged behind her car by the boyfriend that year. He played Russian roulette with his gun on her 21st birthday that year and held her against her will for 5 hours during this ordeal. He kicked the window out of "her" car while they were driving with their child in the back seat. By August, she and I were living together with her son. She had started college to become a medical assistant. She was still working part-time as well. Life seemed to be going forward. The now ex-boyfriend continued to call and tried to see her whenever she would allow it. He demanded to see his son at any given hour of the night or day. He slept days and was up all night while she worked days and tried to sleep at nights. I remember one night he called our house over 50 times in a 3 hour span. The continued signs of control, sleep deprivation, stalking, and obsession were becoming aggressively more violent.

On February 9, 2001, he severely beat and kidnapped Kelly in her own car. For the nine days they were missing. They spent a few nights under a railroad bridge in a cold, rainy February, then stayed at his friends' houses, until early one morning they were dropped off at some railroad tracks in South Sacramento. At 2 a.m. on February 20, 2001, a train going 50 miles per hour killed them both instantly as they stood on the railroad tracks. Their bodies were strewn along the tracks for over 1900 feet. Their relationship had gone out of control for the last time. Knowing how much Kelly loved her son, she did not stand on those tracks of her own will. Now, as the mother of a daughter who I miss so much, I am raising her son. How do I tell him someday that his father killed his mother? How do I tell him that his Mother took such physical abuse from his father until it killed her? If you read this, do not assume that "it" will get better. "IT" will not. If your husband or boyfriend is abusing you, take yourself and your children and run as far away as possible. Abusers do not change - they ultimately only kill. You will become a statistic like Kelly and will not live to tell about it. Domestic violence brings horror to those in it and to those left behind! Make a choice today to find peace and happiness! Get out NOW! Do not look back! or else "it" will get you too!

Back to Home